Motherhood is Kingdom Work
“Motherhood is kingdom work.” It’s a saying on a shirt that my sister got me when I had my fourth baby boy this last spring. It sounds cliché or trite, but when I really think about it, it’s such a powerful message; one that God has so kindly shown me over the last 8 years of being a stay-at-home mom.
The Move
I remember finding out I was pregnant in 2018. I had moved up to New England from Alabama, newly married, with no family here except my husband. We had gotten married that June at the age of 23, and two months into our marriage we found out we were expecting our first child. We were so excited, but that year was one of the hardest years of my life. Before the move, I was so comfortable with my life in Alabama. I was teaching kindergarten in the district I had gone to school in myself, and I lived 10 minutes down the road from my parents. I was in a familiar area, with familiar people, and I wanted to keep it that way. Leaving all of that behind to move to a place I couldn’t even find on a map was incredibly hard. The houses were different, the people were different, the pace of life was different (even down to driving, people drive crazy here!), and it was really hard for me to adjust.
The Pregnancy
The first trimester of my pregnancy I was blindsided by constant nausea and vomiting, I lost a ton of weight, and I spiraled into an emotional mess. I wanted to leave Connecticut so badly; I even asked my husband to start looking for jobs in Alabama so that we could go back as soon as possible. Being the wonderful husband that he is, he did look, but ultimately we did not move back. Thankfully with time, the sickness and my emotional state got a bit better, and fast forward to May of 2019, our precious baby boy was born.
Deciding to Stay Home
I remember having this new baby and this new life that all felt so foreign to me, and far from what I expected my life to look like at 24. I had gone to college to be an elementary school teacher and had only taught one year. I always thought my plan would be to leave my baby with my mom and go back to teaching at 6 weeks postpartum, but that was not an option living in Connecticut. The thought of going back to work and leaving my baby put a pit in my stomach. The idea of daycare did not feel right for our family. I did the math, and we would break even paying for day care on a teacher’s salary. From this practical standpoint, it made sense for me to stay home, and we decided that’s what I would do.
However, all I could think about was that I was doing something wrong. Do other moms with degrees do this? Would staying home with my baby be a life that was worthy of the college degree my family had just paid so much for? So many questions like these swirled through my head.
God’s Blessing and Provision
I could feel God changing my heart, stirring in me a desire to stay home. I searched the internet trying to find a book or post in support of moms staying home. By God’s grace, I began to discover other stay-at-home moms and families who had made this choice, and read stories of how it had blessed them and their families immensely. I began to see that God had woven all of these events in my life over the past few years just for this moment– to invite me into the messy, hard, glorious life of being a stay-at-home mom. If we would have stayed in Alabama, I truly don’t think we would have chosen for me to stay home, and would have missed out on the sweetness of being with my children. I realized that my life is but a vapor (James 4:14), and this time with them is so short and precious. I wanted to soak it up and cherish it always. God showed me what important work I could do at home for my children, my husband, my neighbors, but most importantly, for Him.
“Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.” Colossians 3:23
“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45
This is My Unique Story
Hear me out, I’m not saying that every woman should/can stay home, or that if you are a working mom you’re not doing kingdom work. I’m just sharing my story and how God has revealed his goodness and faithfulness to me, even in circumstances that didn’t look how I thought they would. I never thought I would find so much fulfillment and peace in a life lived from home, but I do, and I am so thankful God has allowed me to do so.
Being a homemaker, wife, mom to my boys, learning to keep a house, cooking from scratch, & so much more has been messy, it’s been hard, but it’s been oh so sweet, and deeply satisfying.
When I stop and ponder on my life, I feel rich. Not in a monetary way, but in a spiritual way that transcends far beyond this earthly life. I’m so glad God didn’t give me what I thought I wanted.
I want to end this post with powerful lyrics from singer Christy Nockels that speak deeply to my momma heart:
“In a world that’s forever elsewhere
We were made to be right here together, in this together
So slow down and take in the moment
‘Cause everything is gonna be alright, I know it
You’re alright, so just be where your feet are!
Yeah, be where your feet are!
When we sit in tomorrow
And we call it today
How will we look back
On our yesterday?
Yea, we’re so good at dreaming
About the places we’ll go
But look what we have here
These are moments of gold!”
Be Blessed Friend,
Mariah